Have you ever felt exhausted… but can’t quite explain why?

In my practice, I regularly meet people who arrive feeling drained, battling headaches, tension, or poor sleep. They want answers — “Why do I feel like this?”

One of the things I ask (and yes, people sometimes look surprised) is:

👉 “Tell me about your day… your breaks… your lunch?”

It may seem like a strange place to start — until we think about it like a car.

If you accidentally filled a petrol car with diesel… it would break down. (I’ve done this — the car refused to move! 🚗💥)

We’re not so different.

When we rush, skip meals, stay late… our system slowly grinds to a halt too. Often, without us noticing until the warning lights flash.

🌟 But here’s the catch…

Many people aren’t skipping breaks because they want to. They’re doing it because deep down they feel they should.

✨ To please

✨ To be the reliable one

✨ To feel valued

✨ To avoid letting anyone down

It’s a way of protecting connection — a hidden attachment behaviour.

But it comes at a cost.

Let’s take just one example 👇

📌 Not taking a 30-minute lunch break each day

(UK law: entitled to a minimum 20-minute break when working 6+ hours — paid/unpaid depends on your contract)

If you work ~37.5 hours a week over ~46 working weeks a year and skip 30 minutes each day…

➡️ That’s around 115 hours of free labour a year

➡️ Roughly 3 weeks of unpaid work

➡️ Over a working life, that adds up to about 2 years of unpaid time ⏱️

🫣 Two. Whole. Years.

Given away… without even realising it.

And that’s only one hidden cost of people-pleasing.

⚠️ Others include:

📌 Energy disappears but demands keep coming

📌 Home life suffers — nothing left in the tank

📌 Anxiety and overthinking creep in

📌 Self-worth becomes tied to being helpful

📌 Burnout edges closer every time your needs come last

This is what happens when our attachment drive (the desire to feel accepted and secure) overrides our self-worth (the belief that our needs matter too).

So maybe pause and ask yourself:

✨ Am I skipping breaks to maintain connection?

✨ What might change if I honoured my time the way I honour others’?

✨ How would it feel to leave on time today — without apology?

You deserve more than the scraps of your energy.

You deserve the whole seat at the table.

Your journey, your worth, your way. 💛

💬 I’d love to know — what’s one small boundary you could set this week to protect your well-being at work?

Top